Being a UJOman at Yale means living In a UJOrlll
but the real UJOrld will shoUJ them that they are
but UJe must all learn to say -

Vive la diff&ence!
Neomi Rao
ON nus 25w ANNIVERSARY OF coeducation at YaJe. everything indica1es that the ttansition bas oc.curred smoothly. Women stand
on equal footing in almost all aspects of student life.
In the meritocratic world that
Yale bas become, one hardly notices differences between the
sexes. Celebrations and monu-

ments lo women all seem a little
silly. Who understands anymore
how being a woman is different?
ls it biology7 Brain structure7 A
heightened s~nsitivity? No one
can really say.
After 25 years of coeducation,

As Drori said. " If you lake the
initiative you can do whatever you
want at Yale. I baven·1 felt restricted in anything that I've
wanted todo."
The only area of possible discrimination seems to be up on
Science Hill, where few science
majors are women.
Yet this distribution seems a
result of personal choice, rather
than sexism. There arc not many
women majoring in theoretical
physics or applied math, but those
who do don't feel any<liscrimination.
Elizabeth WeUington, a senior

Whal reminine mystique?

Does studying with the boys
demystify the relations betweeo
the sexes?
Mrs. Francie Field, who graduated in 1942from Vassar,married
a Yale man. When she attended
his junior prom, from her wrist
dangled a card which listed her
panner for each dance. Her date
made sure that she received a
dance with nil of bis friends, and
such notables as the captain oflhe
football team.
Today, if a man handed a
woman such a card, he would

ted as students into its large golhic
buildings. Traditions evolved as
our society changed, making SIU·
dents a little more cosmopolitan,
and a lot more cynical.
Thedance card might seem like
a joke now, but al one time ii
represented all the magical excitement of counship. Leaving
school on the weekend and meeting your man under the clock at
the Biltmore in New York-bow
different from the relationships of
Yale, circa 1995.
Baby it's a wild world

So what happens when women

women still face a unique set or

questions, questions which in the
pursuit of equality we often ig-

nore. Maybe men and women are
fundamenmlly<lifferent. Oureduca1ional nunuring often masks differences in nature. For women,
happiness requires more than a
navy blue power suit.
Studying with the boys
So, mos1 people ask, is there

discrimination in the clnssroom?
Do women have <lifliculty keeping up? Almost no one would say
that cliscri.minatioo occurs within
the confines of the classroom.
Equality in the classroom is pretty
much de rigueur, according Lo
women majoring in everything
from physics 10 English.
But thls should come 11S no surprise. Overthepastdecades, Yale
has dedicated itself to a relatively
firm meritocracy, which drops its
standards only for a few minorities, some legacies and a football
player here or there. Otherwise, a
Yale student need have no privilege or status, only than a good
mind. Women have undoubtedly
benefited from such a standard.
because a meritocracy cuts across
traditional lines of gender bias.
Ability has become the universal standard for Yale students. It
applies to both academics and
activities.
Women edit the major newspapers, run things in the Yale Political Union and start their own
groups when they see a need forit.
Danna Drori founded ECHO
(Eating Concerns Hotline Outreach) 10 answer student questions about everything from eat•
ing disorders to geneml questions
about healthy eating. Toe hotline
serves as an intermediate step for
students who don' t necessarily
want to seek formal counseling.

who designed a special divisional
major in biology management.
says that she has never experienced any discrimination: "Being a woman in the sciences, I
never felt as though I was treated
<liffereatly.
Women might feel intimidated
by not seeing other women in science. hul that's a personal choice.
Yale really encourages you to do
your own thing."
Many people speculate about
the small number of female science majors. Is it some inherent
difference in the mind7 Social
discrimination in elemcnlary
scbool7
Wellington said that women
don't major in sciences been.use
they "don't want 10 be with scieocegeeks, and they don't want to
turn into sciencegeeks-<llthough
of course not all science majors

aregeeks. lt' sjusttheperception
that you're going to spend all of
your time alone with mice."

PAGE 8 • THE YALE FREE PRESS

b.lve 10 be prepared to endure fits
of laughter and ridicule. In fact,
holding open a door might receive
asimilarresponse. Liberation bas
surely brought the demise of certain social graces. But for women
at Yale, it's tough to understand
thetrade-off. lfafewmoresocial
graces means not attending Yale,

leave meritocratic Yale for the
real world? Prepared for whatcvercareers await them aJongside
their male friends, women can
compete for the most competitive
jobs, for spots al the most elite
graduateand professional schools.
Yet for those wbo want to have
families, they will have 10 step

"A t Yale tlicy e11c,mrage you to
forget tlillf you're 11 wo1111111. If 111/
the s11111rt WOIIH'II go to Ivy League
colleges 1111d l111i c CIJl'l'crs 1111d 11ever
l1m•c kids, tl1C11 ,l'c'l/ luwc a big
pro/Jlc111."
1

women today would certainly lose
the dance card.
Old Yale did not vanish with
coeducation. Its decline began
wcU before women were admit-

outside all this for at least some
amount of time, and confront the
choices which face them.
Alana Zielinski '91, a member
of the Reserve Officer Training

Corps (ROTC) as an undergraduate, said that her views about gender have changed dramatically
since sbe was an undergraduate.
She arrived al Yale believing in a
strict equality: "I thought th11
differences in gender lead to subjugation. I don't want to be subjugated, so therefore I'm not differcnL"
Bui now, several years after
Yale and Dulce law school.
Zielinski said, '"Yale students are
generally naive about gender issues ... Most women [there] bave
never been held back, never hit 1
wall they couldn't climb. They
don't think that there are limitations, why should they? As you
get older and stan thinking about
having a family, you makecertam
choices ...
Many undergraduate women do
seem aware that they wlll have IO
make certain choices, but this does
001 limit the way that they think
about the future. Govin<limMuny
'97, vice chair of the Independent
Pany and former coordinator of
the Women's Caucus of the Yale
Political Union. said. "Womendo
have a harder time in the real
world. But I plan 10 have a career
and a family and do it all. I lhinlt
it's all a matter of perception. I
see the world as a place which 11
open to me. Obviously I will have
to make trade-offs, but I don't
thjnk: women focus on Lbcir limitations. They shouldn't feel victimized."
Mtistofthe women interviewed
for this article said that they have
rarely, if ever, experienced any
gcnder~bnsed discrimination.
Most also did 001 expect thelf
career plans to hinderthcirdesue
tobavefamilies. Butseniorshead·
ing into the unknown could not
say with certainty how they would
work in family commilmeol.!>
Drori said, " I guess my friends
and I don' t talk that much about
having families. We don't think
that it's going 10 be huge problem-maybe that's naive."
Wellington. who wants 10 raise
a family but also maintain a ca·
reer, sees her futum as somewhat
of a challenge. '"As a woman you
have 10 be stronger. You just
learn to balance the needs of oth·
ers aJoog with your own.'·
Certainly some women go into
the world and balance successful
careers with raising a family. but
the questions they far:e in the real
world will ultimately be different
from the concerns of men. As

 relative equality. Women may be equal to men,
t the same. It may not alUJt1ys be easy to accept,

Zielinski said, " I still be~eve in
equality, but no longer in
sameoess."

Sugar and spice •.
Women and men arc not the
same. Even if they receive equal
tn:atmcnl in the classroom. bal Iroom and the boardroom. thaldoes
not elurunate this fact.
But we sull do not uodcrttand
exactly wbal the physiological differeoccs are, or what they mean.
In a world of mentocncy and
vutualequahtybetweenthesexes,
coming 10 gnps with the reality of
sa,derdJffcrencesraJSesdJfficul1
quesuons
Should gender have any conse•
queoces for the way we approach
the wor1d? YaJe women seem
generally corn on thiJ ,ssuc. They
want 10 ucceed ,n their grand
amb,uons, and yel at they same
ume they do DOl wan1 to have to
act 1n a parucular manner 1n order
to achieve lhclf goals
Murty. who believes linnlythal
women can succeed m their pu.r•
SWIS II Yale. fiodJ that certain
nusogynasuc concepuoru remam
"There are some perccpuons I find
obnoxiouJ. hkc for women to succeed they •omdiow ba,e IO act
hke men It makes 11 seem hkc
success, amb1uon, and drive arc
only male qualtties, when they are
not ao cxclu.Si\o'e ma.Jc preserve."
Other women find that the

songlc-miodcd pursuit of careen
can be lom1ung to thetrother goals
and asptniUor,s. Welhngton, who
would hkc to bu,e a b1otechnology career but places an extn:mely
strong emphasis on mis mg a fam•
dy, believe lhaL "Women deli•
n11ely h3ve to face a d1ffereo1 set
or questions . Al Yale they teach
you all about bemg a Sln"1g person. They cnccunige yoo 10 for•
get that you. re I woman Ir all the
smart women go 10 Ivy League
colleges and have careen and
DC\'crha'tc kt<h. then we'd have a

big problem."
While there may not be overt
sexism, Yale's careerism encour•
aacs a behcf among students that
a Yale cducauon 1s wasted on
women who decide only to raise a
fanuly. Many argue that mainuuruog a hou,ehold does not requ,rc a Yale degree. Yet this
olliludc takes a very narrow pcrspccti,-e on mothemood, which
reqwres a full ninge of talents lo
r111sc successful children
Furthermore, raising children

does not always simply mean a
few tonuous months away from
the office. Having a family can
quite legi11mately be the focus of
an intelligent woman's life. She
may choose 10 work before and
afterbavmgcbildren, but take time
10, as one friend said. " walk my
kids through the park and buy
them pretzels."
Z.etinslu echoes a surular concc:m. Asa womanconccmcdwith
swting both her career in law and
her farruly, sbe worries that motherhood has been devalued:
"It's almost as though mother•
hood is not considered a job for
which additional mtclligcncc or

charm were necessary. People
thmk ,cs a waste if yoo become a
mother first. lt's so sad. How can
11 not be true that some people
would nu.se better children than
otheN?"
Women can wear different bats
at different stages of their lives.
As Anna Qumdlcn said recently
m an address to Yale studcnts-1t' snot that women cannot have it
aJI, it's just that they cannot have
1t all at the ume umc.
Women may havcd1ffcrent pri•

on tics than men, but this does not
imply subordination or inequal•
11y
As Welhngton observed, "To
me it's not paradoxical 10 be equal
to men in the classroom, and then
di ffo- in my penooal hopes and
dreams."
Certain biological facts about
motherhood cannot be ignored-they are realmes dismissed ooly
by the naive. Questions about
child-rwsing and work confront
women m a way that even the
rucestSNAG(Scns,uveNew Age
Guy) could not uodcntand.

Wolf, who speaks of power feminism urock.ing the world," must
admit that both men and women
often have conflicting desires. ln
her most recent book Fire with
Fire:

~

New Female Powu

and How Ir Will Change the 2/Jr
C,mury, Wolf writes," Many men,
perhaps mos~ waver between being egalitarians and palriarchalists
... just as most women waver be1Ween1hedesirc forindcpeodcnce
and the longing for passivity."
Differences between men and
women have been written about
and argued over for years. Usually observations of these differences have been a means ror keep-

admitted by intelligent women
who no longe, fear being lllrus1
back into the kitchen IO live barefoot and pregnant. Gcndcrdiffe,.
cnces need not only limit; they
can also empower.
Manytraditiooallyconservative
women derive a great and simple
joy from their womanhood. For
them, nothing could possibly ex•
ceed the gratifJCation of mother·
hood. Other women take power
from the control they possess over
meo.
Camille Paglia, noted vamp and
tramp scholar, writes, '"The male
projection of erection ... is the
paradigm for all cultural projoc-

\\"0111c1111111_11 l,m ,c diffcrc11t
_priorities tl11w 111c11, /mt t!,is docs
11ot i111p/_11 s11/}()rdi11atio11 or
i11cq1111/it_11. As \Vclli11gto11
o/1sc1Tcti, " fo 111c it's not
p11r11doxirnl to t,c cq1111/ to 111c11 i11
t!,c c/11ssroo111, 11111/ f/,CII differ i11
111_11 pcrso1111/ !,opes 1111d dr1.';1111s. "
ing women subordinated. Recent
studies have revealed that women
use more areas oftheir brains when
reading and speak.ing-,;howing
at least the initial intimations of
cognitive differences. Yetreponers must always be careful to
qualify their findings. Scientific
differences seem dangerous becau.se they might tn,nslale into
sexism.
Th, New York Tim,s carefully
described the study to assure that
the non-scientific do not jump to

tion andconcep<ualization-from
art and ph1losopby10 fantasy, hal-

lucination,andobsession. Women
have conceptualized less in bis•
tory not because men have kept
them from doing so but because
womendonotnudtoconceptualii.e in order to exist. I leave open

theques1ionofbraindifferenccs."
Women, like men, have numer•
ous sides 10 their personalities.
Paglia writes that women do not
need 10 think in orderto exist, and
yet in modem society women can

/>cr/111ps gender diflcrc11ccs Ctlll /Jc 11d111ittcd /Jy wo111c11
,ulw 110 lc111gcrfi'111" /Jci11g t!,mst /111ck i11to the kitche11 to
fit •c [111rcfi111/ 1111d prcg111111t.
Nature vs. nurture
In an cnv1ronmc:n1 free from mosl
debil11aung gender stereotypes,
women at Yale compete oo an
equal fooung with their peers 10
become successful, educated and
powerful. Yet at the same time,
they must internally gnapple with
often irreconc,lablc connicts be·
tween the nurturing which has libcrated them, and the nature which
calls them to a life of the family.
Even Yale graduate Naomi

any hasty conclusions. "'It does
not say that women's brains are
better at llus taslc than men's or
vicevena." Tbcyarejustdiffcrent,and no judgment can be made
about the differences. Murty expressed some concern over the
new studies, saying. "I just hope
that they aren't used by silly revisionists as an excuse to limit
people's freedom."
In today's more opco world,
perhaps these differences can be

think and produce great works if
they have the ability and the cJe.
sire. Womco can be reduced ocithcr 10 the HiUary Clinton bitch·
model nor to the primeval earth
mother wielding mystic powers
over men. In 1995, the female
paradigms for Yale women are
much more complex.
Whett do we go now?

In a world ofrelativeacademic

and material equality women feel
as though they have fewer battles
This has
forced women away from .. femi•
nism"-that pejorative label
which pertains to an ideology and
movement with multiple definitions.
While most women might shy
away from fem.in.ism and its contemporary usociations with rad.i•
calism and lesbianism, in reality
mos1 Yale women Jive with the
expectation of social and economic equality. If they were 10
return 10 the America of 1970,
they would most likely burn their
bras with the most radical or the
female activists.
Yale, it seems, lures women
into a false sense of security. Familiarwithequal opportunity. they
do not need any son of feminism.
But after having grown up in a
reasonably fair and equal environmeru they face a much more
hostile world. As seniors go
through the intcrview process for
jobs in investment bankiag and
consulting, many women have
found lhal their male peers h3vc a
definite advantage.
One mnn, interviewing with a
prominent investmcnl bank on
campus, was told by his male interviewer, ••1want to hire the kind
of man who could back me up if I
got into a fight in a bar." Now that
kind of interviewer is never, ever
going to hire a woman.
Where does that leave a woman
headed for the business world,
who has forgotten her woman•
hoodordytobepainfuUyreminded
of ii by some mealhead inter•
viewer? Certainly women should
001 be told by the ladies al career
services, "Give up, (or wear a
short skirt)! The world is loo
hostile for you!" But at the same
time,womencaoordybenelitfrom
a more honest ruscussion of the
unique questions and difficulties
which race them.
Women at Yaleg.ivc men a run
fortheirmooey. Wehavcachieved
virtual equality, yet we will never
achieve sameness. Nature has
been kepi hiddco under power
suits as women have climbed the
corpor.ue ladder. Perhaps now,
after 25 years of coeducation, the
power suit can be put away just
long enough to bear the questions
asked by nature.
10 fight in the real world.

-Neomi Rao, Editor Emeritus, is
a senior in Silliman College and
owns rwo power suiu.

FEBRUARY/MARCH 1995 • PAGE 9